Giving Birth Doesn’t Make Me Room Mom

Momservation: Giving birth made me Mom – not Room Mom, Team Mom, Carpool Mom, Snack Mom, or Super Mom.

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How come no one asks Rollie to be Room Mom?

How come no one ever asks me to be coach?

Sure, I may not have previous experience playing organized baseball, basketball, football or soccer. But I didn’t have previous experience organizing parties, field trips and snacks for dozens of children and, yet, no one had a problem asking me to do that. Repeatedly.

Does something about me look like I’m better suited to creating a snack schedule than a pass route?

Does the fact that I am home for my children instead of behind a desk in an office building somehow qualify me to make costumes for the school play instead of a batting order and team line-up?

In fact, I have more knowledge in football (John Madden has nothing on me), experience in rugby (Most Valuable Player in Smear the Queer 1981), and skill in endurance training (I’m a triathlete, but I think keeping up with the kids gets me in better shape), than most dads who think they are qualified to coach because they once wore a jock strap.

But hey, I got a big car so my skill set must be carpool.

I love my kids. I love doing stuff for them. I love being involved. I want to help.

I don’t love that because I’m Mom being involved gets translated to Room Mom, Team Mom or Carpool Mom.

Granted, they now call these positions of organization Room Parent, Team Parent and Carpool Driver. So far though, no one has asked my husband to volunteer for any of these jobs. And he’s a much better sewer than I am.

He was asked to coach baseball again, though. Doesn’t even know who Rollie Fingers is.

Pitched for the A’s, Padres and Brewers 1968-85. Among being a great relief pitcher and having his jersey number retired by two teams, he was known for his handlebar mustache. His daughter, Laurel, was in my brother’s 4th grade class.

Bet he wasn’t asked to be Room Parent.

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