Chip Off the Ol’ Smart-A** Block

Momservation: Comedians are born at the dinner table.

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It’s a flat out fact in our house that Daddy is the funniest person we know. His quick wit, one line zingers, and appreciation for a good fart have won him a loyal following around here.

And it’s becoming apparent that someone has been taking notes. Turns out we have a pretty funny little smart-a** junior in our house:

Our 10 year old daughter, Whitney.

Whit practicing her early comedic timing

Granted, we could kind of see it coming.

Like at three when she let out a fart and said, “Put THAT in your baby book.”

Or at four heading off to the bathroom announcing, “I gotta go drop the kids off at the pool.”

Or leaving the bathroom declaring, “The Browns are in the Super Bowl!”

Of course, she was just regurgitating Daddy’s amateur potty humor (big laughs at that age – first lessons in gotta know your audience), but her comedic timing was spot on.

Soon, Whit was coming up with her own Daddy inspired gems.

Like at five declaring after leaving her Presbyterian preschool, “I don’t know why we thank God for snack. We should be thanking the grocery store – everyone knows that’s where food really comes from.”

And at six when she was the banker for a family game of Monopoly. Shaking her head as she cashed out me and Nana’s last remaining properties to stay alive she said, “Wow. You guys are hanging on like a loose tooth.”

Or at seven when I was waking her for school and asking her what she wanted for breakfast. The first words out of her mouth without even opening her eyes were, “Can I have a serving of Saturday with a side of Sunday?”

Lately her observational humor has been cracking everyone up at the dinner table, specifically her hero and mentor, Daddy. Nothing makes either of them happier than cracking each other up.

Like Whit deciding that the dentist office smells like fear and pain. Or after a jet-lagged return to school after vacation announcing, “If being tired could kill you, I’d be dead right now.”

But the one that had Daddy beaming with pride that his chip-off-the-ol’-smart-a**-block had finally come into her own happened this weekend when he handed off a telemarketer to his daughter to have fun with.

Here’s how it went:

Telemarketer: Is your mom or dad available?

Whitney: Can I ask who’s calling?

Telemarketer: This is So-and-So from Auto Insurance Company

Whitney: Are you trying to sell us something?

Telemarketer: No, we’d just like your opinion on auto insurance.

Whitney: Well, my opinion is that you should call someone else.


Daddy couldn’t have done it better himself.

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