Momservation: One person’s communal trauma is another person’s Amish Friendship Bread opportunity.
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What does it say about my life that, really, nothing has changed for me during the California Shelter-in-Place (SIP) order over two months ago?
Mr. Essential still leaves for work at 7 a.m., I still get up shortly after that thanks to a dog who insists on being fed, and then I continue on with my daily routine of walk the dog, exercise the Kel, get some writing done, and take care of daily chores and meals.
Granted, the gym has become off limits, but this time of year I usually like to exercise outside anyway. I have always tried avoiding the grocery store treating it more like the Hunger Games when I do have to go. And one of my college-age children was forced to come home, but since she is still in denial that she’s here—so am I, still just doing laundry, cooking and cleaning for two. (Gotta love a kid who can fend for themselves.)
My social life did take a hit. I do miss going out to dinner with friends, the movies with my mom, and going to concerts and events with Hubby. Trips planned for 2020 have been falling off the calendar like overripe fruit from a tree. It was going to be so wonderful and delicious and now it just lies in waste at my feet.
But the actual day-to-day living of SIP?
Let’s just say the Coronavirus pandemic has revealed that I live an isolation-friendly lifestyle over here at Wheeler Acre. Not only has this SIP not tortured me (besides my head-strong aversion to people telling me what I can and can’t do), I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m pretty damn happy you all are forced into my preferred lifestyle.
As a self-described extroverted introvert, I love that instead of me having to play your game all the time of making sure I get out and do stuff with people so that I have friends, now it’s my turn for everyone to play my favorite game: stay home, read, do puzzles, bake, plant flowers, play games with my family, enjoy my own company.
The whole world having to stay home is also my dream because it has eliminated the thing that forces me to engage when I just want to cuddle up on the couch with a Chris Hemsworth movie and Ben & Jerry’s: FOMO.
The Fear Of Missing Out is gone! It’s great! Everyone is doing nothing with me! Isn’t it fun? Isn’t it wonderful not seeing all the great things everyone is doing, then feeling bad about yourself because you’re not, and weren’t invited anyway?
Do you know we’re bonding right now? That we’re becoming friends without me having to leave my house? Isn’t it fantastic?!
My daughter jokingly calls this, “Communal Trauma,” explaining that, normally, it’s when everyone becomes bonded by experiencing something traumatic together. However, she and her friends think it’s funny that communal trauma for them is no more shared wine bags on Wine Wednesday. And, of course, your trauma of being forced to stay home is my utopia—but I’ll play along so we can become besties.
So even though there is very real danger and tragedy in the world right now as we try to figure out how to live with Covid-19, and I am beyond grateful that those I love and care about are weathering this storm, I admit a small part of me is gleeful that the world has taken a moment to slow down to a pace I find more natural.
Actually, I lie. I think it’s fantastic. I love doing communal trauma with you guys! Anyone want to bake some banana bread?
#CommunalTrauma #NoMoFOMO #ExtrovertedIntrovert